If you've been reading my blog lately, you'll know that it's been a goal of mine to work on developing my faith. I've been seriously lacking in that spiritual department and I've been praying a lot more regularly to help with the process. At church today, all three talks were so perfect and inspired. I love those moments when you hear something right when you need it!
These are the things that resonated with me the most:
It's okay if your faith is imperfect. Imperfect faith does not mean we are less worthy.
I cannot stress how much I needed this! It's hard living in the Provo bubble where it seems like everyone else around me has the most solid testimony and such strong faith. Everyone else is so much more righteous. Everyone else is more worthy and receiving more blessings. Isn't that a terrible and self damaging attitude to have?
It's only been recently as I've been going through some trials that I've noticed how blessed I really am. I am worthy of receiving blessings and of my Heavenly Father's love. Yes, my faith is imperfect. Honestly, whose isn't? I know I'm striving to be better and continually doing the things that I'm supposed to and that's all I can do. This leads perfectly to the next statement I loved.
It's not okay to be content with our level of faith.
Right now I know it's something I definitely need to work on because it's not where I'd like it to be. Faith, just like conversion to the gospel or strengthening your testimony, is an ongoing process. It's so easy to just become stagnant. Our faith can't change and grow if we're not doing anything differently. I'm really pleased with the progress I've been making in this department and it can only get better.
Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith.
I've shared this quote by President Uchtdorf in post before and I'll probably keep sharing it, because it's that good. Iv'e had a recent experience with this recently while job searching. It's been a long, frustrating, and discouraging process trying to get a new job. Looking for a new job is like a job itself. I had a few interviews that I felt went okay but I didn't get the jobs.
There was one place that finally called me back to offer me a job, and I figured they would, but I didn't have a great feeling about it. I told a white lie saying I had an interview with another company the next day so I would call them back to let them know my decision. After the call, I said a quick prayer hoping that things would work out and that I needed something else to come along. I knew I wouldn't like the company and that the work environment wouldn't have been good for me. They had actually told me upfront that while they "aren't sailors or anything" they do use choice words quite often and that I should be comfortable with it. Not even 10 minutes later, I received a call for an interview with another company. Heavenly Father answers prayers. It may not always be that fast, but he always answers. He really does care about our feelings and knows exactly what we need and when we need it.
I didn't end up getting that job, even after doing a second interview. I thought I did great and they even had me stay and observe to see what the job would be like so I thought I had it. But I was wrong. That's when I started to have doubts. I doubted that I made the wrong choice about turning down the job offer. I started to doubt the bad feelings I had about it, even though I clearly had made the right choice and I had prayed about it. Then I realized that's exactly what Satan does. He makes you doubt what you know. He attacks you when you're weak and vulnerable. I needed to doubt my doubts instead of my faith. I'm grateful for these little learning opportunities
